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Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Life Stages

Let’s go where life want to take you as long as your instincts directs you there as well.

I know this life is hard to live right
That’s why everyday I still fight
This stage is when I device a huge fright
Although I’m cashless right now, I’m here to compete
26 letters, plan till there’s food for everyone to eat
Being me is in me like I’m one blood complete
Test me for I ain’t a fraud persona
I never enforced anyone to consider me bright personally
It’s just so gruelling to conclude not convinced
I sweated every phase that I ever reached
At first I felt different then had to embrace it
Started just as an negligible nerd till I raised me
The next will be me out there living it all at one
A nigga could only be granted one life
I’m 21, at this age I’m also thinking about a wife
Days are too short to delay till you fully beard and grey
Hate or love each determines progress
It’s so significantly fluttering though you ain’t saying congrats
Some say, same shit, hey it’s just boring
Flourished in a style that makes other rain on ‘em like pouring
Routine routes that distinct me foreign
Keep hollering, that’s all I need to get my stages going

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Lost Love

This is dedicated to the love of my heart, for i being far and lacking communication with her kills her deep inside.

I hate my life right now, how can I convince you, my love?
Me missing you is a trauma but i hope you ain't doing any drama.
Patience, believing if we survive this we would be fine forever.
Wonder never, if ever would we settle to family ever
Because you'd always be the one through varied fever
All problem life throw at us with love they are resolvable
We isolated by ferocity distance that’s why we divisible
You may think I’m enjoying, wish I did too but without you true joy become so impossible.
Dammed lady understand that I fucken miss the hell out of you like crazy.
Not calling doesn't mean I don’t care, I just don't have.
I know what I said on April fool appeared kinda real
Hope it ain’t responsible for your respond to be rare
Turn to be selfish at times, but sometimes i do learn
Call me stupid but I’m still the same stupid you felt for and did love.
Like I you're lost, not to worry my heart will find your love.
Sitting in this box, I’m praying it’s not too late
I desire not to witness when the perfect two fade.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Best Of The Worst

 I know what you're thinking..... I am not really having grudges agains anyone but i simulated for you.

Stubbed in the back but with time I healed quicker 
Instead of struggling to get back I'm getting better
Amazing how we manage this far together without a speaker
But the graph shows some uncertainty towards me since
They both independent on each but ain't on me for an inch
No offense to the ex & why, but this sparks a sense of hilarity in essence
Boy u scared she could still, got you wonderin' about a fence
I guess you should consider
Like if i put 5 bricks, 4 you blow 3 and put two
Would it make the wall mine or yours if it was to be owned by one?
I'd hate to be her, suppose is a dilemma that ain't won
Forgive for I did not alert, the damn battle is still on
So let’s act to our mutual like is all okay
Let’s not talk about chicks like there’s no pain
Let’s let her confused, like is sort of a game
Let’s, let’s, let’s just fuck each G.O.X like there’s not rule to obey
In the end we just gotta face the joker card
I hope I'm wining when I see you two losing some parts
Sluts get it that even if we reunite won’t be similar to before you broke hearts.
Hope you still remember that annoying message about sex king
Hope you clearly recall what I said about our end and kill
I never understood how the fuck a lady takes short term assets as keen
But for all I care now you both could take yo honeymoon to hell.
Yeah it’s a long story but to us is still so memorable
Aren't you ashamed nigga, your selfishness is undeniable
I did you favour but for me you made it unfavourable
That was the last time I'll kick start an idiot scavenger
I won’t let a bitch ruin me by unnecessary anger
Never, now judge me and say never too
And bitch don't you dare ask me if I ever want revenge
To hell I said that now you can kiss my dick to full range
Hoe you're the worst best girl I ever had
And dick you're the best worst friend I ever had

Good Girl Gone Bad

When I met her she was still new to the place, I was the first guy to her, she was so innocent, and I was so hoping a lot, she was so nice and perfect if that is the word. We spend precious time, memorable moments that now feels like it was just a dream. She talked about church, the lord and being decent to others. We made promises even if I knew promises always get broken somehow, but at that time it felt so real and guaranteed.

Somehow I felt so insecure about her room mate, the one who was giving me an eye wink when she was looking a way. She seemed so wild, egomaniac and obsessed with herself. I thought she was just being jealous but it was something more than that, she was evil if that’s suits her.

Well I ignored everything like it’s just an ordinary life, but I was not aware of what was happening. She invited all sort of guys and friends who were mainly eccentric in a way. As work stole my time away from her, another work was applied in her head. I started to feel the gap between us growing so mysteriously, well she rejected my calls and my visits. Till the day I went unannounced only to find her with a male friend and she looked so sorry that it granted her my forgiveness over everything but it did not change anything. After that experience I did another of those surprise visit, this time finding her with a homo-looking lady friend who smoked in her room, using her matches (which she had I don’t know for what reason). She treated me like I don't exist until left the room as frustrated and pissed as I was. After months I tried calling her but she chewed my head on the phoned, annoyed I dropped the stupid call. Couple of month later I came across her wearing scary snoop make over, she walked those styles you know those you usually see self-high classed girls walking by.

Now after a year we met closely, funny thing is that it was in another guy's room and he didn't know me & her girlfriend know each other. The guy left us alone in the room when he going to the bathroom, then I got a chance to take a good look at her. Her face was if she use mortuary puffs, her smell was of feminine typical but not typical of her, her eyes were deeper and darker, her clothes were nothing like anything I ever thought she could ever wear. Her voice was still toned as soft as it used to be but her words and her vocal were contaminated than I could ever imagine of her. that’s when I realized I don’t know the women next to me, she is not the same lady I fell for, there is nothing that I admire about her reflection. I mean yeah I like those snoop looking bitches, but I love them because I know nothing about how they used to be and their much better being. Although she looked more embarrassed of the situation at that moment, she gave me those visuals like she is trying to prove a certain point to everyone. I never said a word to her but in my mind questions were flowing endlessly, questions like is she aware of who she became? Does she present her self in this way at home, to her parent, old friends or it’s only a campus thing? Is she possessed with some kind of evil spirit, a devil worshiper of some sort? Is this what her previous room mate did to her or is it what she made her self? Is she focus on her future with books or that’s her future she’s living? The guy came back and I made up an excuse to leave him together with the creature.

Normally I should be upset with how we ended but I am not, I really feel so sorry and disappointed for what she has became and hope she somehow find god immediately to revive her soul.